After writing yesterday, I realized that I had many awkward moments this past week. Of course, new environment outside of my own comfort zone and new people. Awkward moments were likely to take precedent over normal ones, right? Most of our workshops last week entailed videotaping. After we were recorded doing the various presentations, we would then have to go to the video review room.
If you have never seen yourself on video, like I hadn't, this will be rather painful. My voice was nasally. I found out I have several odd tendencies as I speak. For example, when I am doing a cross-examination, I tend to nod and shake my head. If the witness gives me a good answer, I nod my head, like I am checking it off my list. Apparently, I am a head-nodder. Add the pressure of the videotaping, the material and the eight or so other individuals watching me to the fact that I have to be conscientious about keeping my head still. It was a seemingly insurmountable task.
I then developed another tic. As I gave my closing argument, I noticed that I had my hand on my hip. I really believe that I do not tend to put my hand up on my hip as I speak to a jury and I realized I was doing it, but I was incapable of speaking and putting that hand down. From the time I gave my closing argument to the time of the video critique, I seemed to have forgotten that I had given my closing argument in a very sassy fashion, hand up.
Fast forward to my video review. The faculty member made a few comments, one about the fact that I was starting to sway at the podium. Then we both noticed the hand on the hip. I attempted to divert her attention by discussing my plan of attack of the swaying. I noticed that my hand went down. Good, we wouldn't have to discuss it. And then it crept back up there. Unfortunately, I was not able to keep jawing this time, and we had to discuss it. Embarrassing. I deemed it my "Teapot Move," a term at which we both had a good laugh.
Of course, I go back to the classroom after my video review and demand of my classmates why they hadn't told me about my teapot deliver. They swear they didn't notice, but I'm not so sure. I attempted to reign that in by holding onto the podium and only using my hands for emphasis. Unfortunately, as I was doing my cross-examination in our mock trial, I could feel that hand creep up there. This time I left it. Because cross-examination is all about sass, right?
So, apparently, I am a little teapot. But short and stout. You'll see my handle, and when I am emphasizing a point, you'll see my stout. It's true, when I get all steamed up, I might shout. But don't even try to tip me over. Seriously.
My heart is broken.
6 months ago