Spotted: fabulously awkward street performer.

Actually, I am not sure you can call him a street performer if he is doing his thang in the subway station. Anyone? Well, he was performing. Namely to the tune of "Independent Women Part I" by Destiny's Child. (On that note, does anyone know if Destiny's Child ever come out with an "Independent Women Part II?" Or was Beyonce doing her own thang considered a symbolic "Independent Women Part II?" See. I'm DEEP.)

Back to the performer. I trudged down the stairs to the subway station today, slightly brain dead after a long deposition. I noticed a man down there starting his boom box (pretty sure it wasn't a fancy stereo system.) The tune? The instrumental version of "Independent Women Part I." Only he wasn't singing about his girl Drew, Lucy Liu or Cameron Diaz. Nope. He was singing his devotion, or rather "obsession" (he used that word, NOT me) with Beyonce Knowles. Oh yes. The entire song was made a tribute to not only Beyonce, but also to the fact that she was going to buy him all sorts of things. I believe he said something about an Xbox.

The kicker? He was using a stuffed tiger as a prop. The tiger wasn't life-size, but it definitely was a large stuffed animal. The stuffed tiger had a chain around it. He proceeded to dance down the center of the subway platform with this tiger, using it as a prop to emphasize his words. This fit with his lyrics because he discussed how he was like a tiger and Beyonce told him to be gentle. He also referred to her buying him things such as "Hennessy and a bag of ice and a large order of shrimp fried rice." (Hey, he's got rhyming skills, clearly.)

Maybe he wasn't a street performer. But he was definitely performing. It was highly awkward. I think the tiger gave him the fabulous edge.

(Also, you may wonder why I keep using "thang" instead of "thing." It makes me feel a little sassy. Deal with it. I do my thang, you do yours. Even if you call it a thing.)