Random awkward thoughts

Do you ever have the urge to do something completely inappropriate?

 

I feel like at least once a day, I have the desire to just act like a crazy person.  There was the day in Indianapolis, when walking by a hotel, I had the strongest desire to take one of the luggage carts and ride it skateboard-style.  In my vision, the valet guys would be chasing after me and hollering for me to bring their cart back.  I would toss my head back and laugh, skating away into the sunset.  Of course, after this vision comes to me, I realize that something will go awry and I will end up breaking an arm or getting arrested.  Nothing as cool as I had envisioned in my head.

Just the other day, I saw a guy on the bus with a very worn front right pocket of his jeans.  I had the urge to touch his pants and ask him, in a Tommy-Boy fashion (you know the scene, where he's talking to the roll in the restaurant), "Is your pocket worn out cuz you have so much money in there?"  Again, I decided that this would be a creepy thing to do.

 

And today?  I was in the very crowded elevator going to court and noticed that I was the tallest person in the elevator.  I had the urge to shout out, "I'm the tallest person in here!"  Then I noticed that there was one man taller than me.  So I wanted to amend my shouting to "I'm the tallest person in here, except for you sir, but you're barely taller than me."  Once again, I refrained.

 

I am awkward, aren't I?  At the very least, I am an odd bird.  I like it.